November 30, 2013

Farewell Dr. Paul Crouch


Dr. Paul Frranklin Crouch, 79 years young. March 30, 1934-Nov. 30, 2013
He spoke more about Jesus, miracles and his family more than anything, yet he could be outspoken as well. I fondly remember his choice words for Ted Turner in 1994. His last greatest earthly accomplishments include being part of development of online video and live visual broadcasting, his Heavenly accomplishments are uncountable, and any failures are irrelevant. Thank you, Paul Crouch

November 29, 2013

Angry Christians & Couples Reviewing Marriages

Two articles below:

September 1, 9:30 AM

Why Rate Your Marriage? A Numerical Score Can Help Couples Talk About Problems
Therapists Say They Learn a Lot When Couples Commit to Numbers in Areas Like Trust, Teamwork, Physical Intimacy

By Elizabeth Bernstein

When marriage therapist Sharon Gilchrest O’Neill met with new clients recently, she asked them why they were seeking therapy. The couple told her they’d spent years arguing over finances and recently had their worst-ever blow up. The husband complained about how much money his wife was spending; the wife said her husband was controlling. They hadn’t slept in the same room for months.

Ms. O’Neill, whose practice is in Mount Kisco, N.Y., then asked the question she often poses in a couple’s first session of marriage therapy: “On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you each rate your marriage?”

The spouses’ answers? “7.5″ and “almost an 8.”

“Whoa,” Ms. O’Neill remembers thinking. “What they are saying doesn’t match those numbers.” She would have given their marriage a 4, she says. “Those scores are very telling.”

How would you rate your relationship?

Researchers often rely on rate-your-relationship questionnaires in studies of why some marriages last while others crumble. Therapists say couples can benefit from occasionally using these tools to step back and get a clinical view of behaviors, healthy and unhealthy, in their relationship. The rating process can help start a discussion, clarify strengths and weaknesses and, hopefully, lead to marital growth.

“Rating helps you be honest with the reality of what you are feeling,” says Karen Ruskin, a licensed marriage and family therapist in Sharon, Mass. “And the only way to fix something is to first know what the problem is.” Some experts, rather than assign one overall number to a relationship, encourage couples to examine and rate a number of aspects of the marriage that researchers and clinicians agree are most important.

Clinicians say they learn an enormous amount of information by asking a couple to rate their relationship—including the spouses’ individual perceptions about the level of crisis they have reached, and their willingness to be honest. It is helpful to see which partner states the number first: Often, it is the person who is angrier. The order in which a couple presents their problems suggests the order in which the problems should be addressed, like a road map. “That’s worth six months of therapy right there,” says Paul Hokemeyer, a licensed marriage and family therapist in New York and Boca Raton, Fla.

Attaching hard numbers to the most important relationship in your life comes with some risk, of course. It can be sobering to actually quantify which areas aren’t working well. “You can’t hedge a number,” Dr. Hokemeyer says.

But for couples seeking help for a troubled relationship, a rating serves as a baseline, Dr. Hokemeyer says, a point from which to move upward.

What does it mean when two partners’ scores don’t match? Ms. O’Neill, the Mount Kisco therapist, estimates that 25% of the couples she sees disagree on the score. In those cases, it is often the spouse who rates the marriage very low who has already mentally detached from the relationship, she says, while the spouse who rates it high is “totally clueless.”

The couple she saw recently who gave their troubled marriage such high scores is somewhat typical, she says. “It’s a defense mechanism,” she says. “People are afraid to say their marriage is on the rocks or isn’t happy until they really want out.”

Why is it so hard to clearly see and analyze the health of one’s own marriage? One reason is we don’t have many role models. We don’t know very much about other people’s marriages—the only real one we ever see from “the inside” (sort of) is our parents’.

Each person brings different expectations to the partnership. And most people—even our closest friends—don’t usually publicly air their marital problems, so we have no idea how our relationship stacks up next to others’ relationships.

Research shows that when a couple compares their own marriage with others, they typically judge their own to be better. They focus selectively on what is bad in others’ marriages and what is good in theirs. This is called a Superiority Bias, and couples tend to do it even more when they feel threatened in the relationship, to give themselves a boost of confidence.

“When we want to maintain our own relationship, we distort things,” says Arthur Aron, a relationship researcher at Stony Brook University, in Stony Brook, N.Y., and the University of California, Berkeley. “We overrate the qualities of our partner and underrate other people’s marriages to systematically devalue our alternatives.”

So if you think you would like to try rating your own relationship, how should you go about it? Experts suggest evaluating specific areas that researchers agree are important to a marriage or romantic relationship, including trust, companionship, physical intimacy and teamwork. Readers may want to determine for themselves whether some areas are more important than others.

Some partners won’t want to assign numerical values to aspects of their personal lives. But there is merit even if only one partner completes the test for him- or herself. When you have the results, look at the low scores. Do they occur in areas you and your partner agree are important? “One or two low scores you can use as a signal to improve your relationship,” says Terri Orbuch, a psychologist and research professor at the University of Michigan’s Institute for Social Research.

If there are more than a few, it’s probably time for a talk. “Start with the positives,” says Dr. Ruskin, the marriage therapist in Sharon, Mass. She suggests an opening line: “I love you and I love us. I would like our relationship to be enhanced and grow for many years. So I’ve been thinking about how to do that.”

Take ownership, Dr. Ruskin says. Tell your spouse you know there are things you can do to improve the relationship, and things the spouse can do, as well. Say, “I know we will want to do these things because we love each other.”

Here’s where you talk about the quiz. You might want to say that at first you thought it was silly and that your spouse may think so, too. This might make the results seem less threatening, Dr. Ruskin says. Explain that you think there are some areas that could use improvement, and ask what your spouse thinks. Make it clear that it’s OK if you have a difference of opinion.

Ask your partner if he or she thinks you two can handle working on the relationship together. Can you each think of one thing per category that you can do to improve? If the problems seem overwhelming, it may be time to seek professional help from a counselor.

Whatever you do, don’t compare yourself to other couples, the experts advise. “Evaluate your own expectations,” says Lisa Neff, social psychologist in the department of Human Development and Family Sciences at the University of Texas, Austin.

“We often compare what we are getting in a relationship to what we think we should be getting. To the extent that what we are getting exceeds our expectations, we are going to be happier.”

–Write to Elizabeth Bernstein at Bonds@wsj.com or follow her at www.Facebook.com/EBernsteinWSJ or www.Twitter.com/EBernsteinWSJ.




Kill Anger Before It Kills You or Your Marriage
April 23, 2003 by John Piper
In marriage, anger rivals lust as a killer. My guess is that anger is a worse enemy than lust. It also destroys other kinds of camaraderie. Some people have more anger than they think, because it has disguises. When willpower hinders rage, anger smolders beneath the surface, and the teeth of the soul grind with frustration. It can come out in tears that look more like hurt. But the heart has learned that this may be the only way to hurt back. It may come out as silence because we have resolved not to fight. It may show up in picky criticism and relentless correction. It may strike out at persons that have nothing to do with its origin. It will often feel warranted by the wrongness of the cause. After all, Jesus got angry (Mark 3:5), and Paul says, "Be angry and do not sin" (Ephesians 4:26).

However, good anger among fallen people is rare. That's why James says, "Be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God" (James 1:19-20). And Paul says, "Men should pray, lifting holy hands without anger or quarreling" (1 Timothy 2:8). "Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you" (Ephesians 4:31).

Therefore, one of the greatest battles of life is the battle to "put away anger," not just control its expressions. To help you fight this battle, here are nine biblical weapons.

1. Ponder the rights of Christ to be angry, but how he endured the cross, as an example of long-suffering.

For to this you have been called, because Christ also suffered for you, leaving you an example, so that you might follow in his steps. (1 Peter 2:21)

2. Ponder how much you have been forgiven, and how much mercy you have been shown.

Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. (Ephesians 4:32)

3. Ponder your own sinfulness and take the beam out of your own eye.

Why do you see the speck that is in your brother's eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, "Let me take the speck out of your eye," when there is the log in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother's eye. (Matthew 7:3-5)

4. Think about how you do not want to give place to the devil, because harbored anger is the one thing the Bible explicitly says opens a door and invites him in.

Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and give no opportunity to the devil. (Ephesians 4:26-27)

5. Ponder the folly of your own self-immolation, that is, numerous detrimental effects of anger to the one who is angry - some spiritual, some mental, some physical, and some relational.

Be not wise in your own eyes; fear the LORD, and turn away from evil. It will be healing to your flesh and refreshment to your bones. (Proverbs 3:7-8)

6. Confess your sin of anger to some trusted friend as well and as possible with the offender. This is a great healing act.

Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. (James 5:16)

7. Let your anger be the key to unlock the dungeons of pride and self-pity in your heart and replace them with love.

Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. (1 Corinthians 13:4-7)

8. Remember that God is going to work it all for your good as you trust in his future grace. Your offender is even doing you good, if you will respond with love.

And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose. (Romans 8:28)

Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. (James 1:2-4)

9. Remember that God will vindicate your just cause and settle all accounts better than you could. Either your offender will pay in hell, or Christ has paid for him. Your payback would be double jeopardy or an offence to the cross.

Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, "Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord." (Romans 12:19)

When he was reviled, he did not revile in return; when he suffered, he did not threaten, but continued entrusting [his cause] to him who judges justly. (1 Peter 2:23)

Fighting for joy and love with you,

Pastor John

©2013 Desiring God Foundation. Used by Permission. http://www.desiringgod.org/resource-library/taste-see-articles/kill-anger-before-it-kills-you-or-your-marriage

November 28, 2013

Happy Thanukkah! Jesus celebrated Hanukkah!

Happy “Thanksgivukkah,” “Thanukkah” and “Hanu-giving!”
  This holiday combo has not occurred since 1888 – and, according to astronomers is not scheduled to happen again for another 70,000 years or so.

Jesus celebrated Hanukkah! - 2300 days
Hanukkah 2013: Nov 28 - Dec 5
By Craig C. White

The Hebrew word Hanukkah means “dedication”. Hanukkah is the Jewish celebration of the re-dedication of the temple in Jerusalem in 165 B.C. Hanukkah is celebrated for eight days beginning on the 25th day of the Hebrew month Kislev. While Hanukkah is not one of the appointed Jewish holy days (Leviticus 23, Numbers 29); it is mentioned in the bible. It was prophesied in Daniel 8:14, also Jesus attended a Hanukkah celebration in John 10: 22-23.

In 175 B.C. Israel was under the rule of a wicked Grecian king named Antiochus Epiphanes. He was king over one quarter of the Grecian empire known as the Seleucid dynasty, headquartered in Syria. Antiochus Epiphanes robbed the temple in Jerusalem of its gold and holy vessels. He ended the daily sacrifice, and sacrificed pigs on the Jewish alter. Then he declared that he should be worshiped as God instead of the God of Israel. In 171 B.C. the high priest of Israel (Onias III) was murdered and false Priests were installed in temple worship.

In 167 B.C. a group of Hebrew rebels from Judea (which is the region around Jerusalem), known as the Maccabees began to fight the Syrian authorities in Jerusalem. The Maccabees regained control of the temple, and in 165 B.C. on the 25th day of the Hebrew month of Kislev the Jewish people resumed the daily sacrifice (1 Maccabees 4:52). This is the day that Israel celebrates Hanukkah (the dedication of the temple).

Hanukkah, or the day that the temple sacrifice would continue was prophesied in Daniel 8:14. God told Daniel about Hanukkah in 551 B.C. (Daniel 8: 1).

Daniel 8:14 And he said unto me, Unto two thousand and three hundred days; then shall the sanctuary be cleansed.

Daniel 8:14 says that the temple will be defiled for 2300 days; or that sacrifices will be interrupted for 2300 days. If you count 2300 days from the day that the high priest Onias III was murdered in 171 B.C. you come to Kislev 25, 165 B.C. That is the day of Hanukkah!

Jesus celebrated Hanukkah! In verse 22 below, the “feast of the dedication” is the same as Hanukkah.

John 10:22-30 And it was at Jerusalem the feast of the dedication, and it was winter. 23 And Jesus walked in the temple in Solomon’s porch. 24 Then came the Jews round about him, and said unto him, How long dost thou make us to doubt? If thou be the Christ, tell us plainly. 25 Jesus answered them, I told you, and ye believed not: the works that I do in my Father’s name, they bear witness of me. 26 But ye believe not, because ye are not of my sheep, as I said unto you. 27 My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me: 28 And I give unto them eternal life; and they shall never perish, neither shall any man pluck them out of my hand. 29 My Father, which gave them me, is greater than all; and no man is able to pluck them out of my Father’s hand. 30 I and my Father are one.

Happy Hanukkah from High Time to Awake!
Sources: https://m.facebook.com/hightimetoawake?id=100003157740206&_rdr

http://hightimetoawake.com/2013/11/28/20-off-ebook-deal-2/

November 26, 2013

Wife of American Jailed in Iran 'Devastated' US Didn't Demand Release

It's been awhile since last time I wrote. Not for lack of interests, but of quality inspiration.  Please keep Saeed Abedini and his family in your prayers. We can all likely relate to discouragement and hopelesness, but we should all remind ourselves of the times of great joy and strength through our victories as well. My first thoughts upon reading the below article is, perhaps there really is an unrevealed plan to release Pastor Saeed.  That is my prayer. Also, I had the honor to meet Mrs. Abedini couple months ago, with Saeeds Mom, his little sister and his two children, but his son just wasn't there for the family photo we took. He was playing nearby.  And the lady next to Saeeds wife second from right is a dear friend of their family. God bless, and again, please say a prayer for this wonderful family, and for Pastor Saeed soon release.

Naghmeh Abedini, Pastor Saeed Abedini and their two young children in this undated family photo. (Photo: aclj.org)

Wife of American Jailed in Iran 'Devastated' US Didn't Demand Release

Monday, 25 Nov 2013 06:39 PM
By Amy Woods

Naghmeh Abedini, whose American husband Saeed Abedini remains imprisoned in  Iran, spoke out Monday about the failure of the United States to work the Christian pastor's release into the nuclear deal reached early Sunday, Fox News reported.

"It's devastating," Naghmeh Abedini said. "Iran has no incentive for them to release him. I don't think we have any more leverage. We now have to consider other avenues and having other countries speak out because our country, when we could have used our leverage, chose to stay silent."

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With the holidays approaching, Naghmeh Abedini said her children were praying their 33-year-old father, who has been behind bars for more than a year because of his Christian religious practices, would be returned to the United States.

"It's unbearable to think of another Christmas without him and see my kids not have him home for Christmas," she said.

Despite the hope of the family, Saeed Abedini's freedom was not a talking point when the Obama administration struck an agreement with Iran on its nuclear program.

According to the White House, the release of Abedini — a U.S. citizen who was born in Iran and who was working in an Iranian government-approved orphanage when he was arrested — did not enter discussions that took place last week in in Geneva.

President Barack Obama raised the issue of Saeed Abedini's release in September during earlier rounds of talks with Iranian President Hassan Rouhani, but an agreement allowing the prisoner to come home was not reached, prompting the American Center for Law and Justice to reach out to Secretary of State John Kerry.

ACLJ Chief Counsel Jay Sekulow accused both Obama and Kerry of turning their backs on a U.S. citizen; however, Caitlin Hayden, a spokeswoman for the National Security Council, said Saeed Abedini's case, as well as the cases of other American prisoners in Iran, have been part of diplomatic discussions.

Censored Files Series ep1 "New Indie Music, Words Without Knowledge, and Ukraine": 1st aired, Feb 12, 2022. Censored on Feb 16, 2024

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